Slice of Life Day 25: honey there's the door

I'm cheating again. I was supposed to post this yesterday but Monday drained me of life so I'm posting this today and backdating it but whatever I still got it done. Nobody is keeping track of this anyway so I'm really only explaining to myself. Moving on.

Today's post is brought to you by the music video above. If you have no desire to watch it, I'll summarize it for you. Basically it's a beautiful woman outfitted majestically informing a lover that if they don't tell her how beautiful/ smart/ funny she is that they are of no use to her and should leave. I found that concept incredibly stimulating.

Mostly because for the majority of my life I would have given that sentiment a standing ovation. Women are queens and should be reminded of that at all times, etc. But the stimulating part was the equal and opposite reaction that came from my brain which complained of how unfair that is to the people who love women. Let me explain.

Yes you may think your lover is beautiful and funny and you may even want to tell them those things but that's not all you are worth as a partner. To reduce a partnership to one adoring the other is trite at best and abusive at worst. And yet this kind of relationship is still idealized which honestly blows my mind. Maybe I'm overreacting but this concept is a bit personal to me.

I used to live with someone who treated me very poorly. I'm sure this is news to no one. But one of the things he used to ask me is of what use I was in the relationship. I didn't cook, I didn't have sex with him regularly enough, I might as well just be his roommate. That understandably put a big dent in my self esteem much the way I imagine the above sentiment would to someone else's.

I guess the moral of the story is that people are complex creatures that provide various things to each other and that we should be cognizant of that. If you are looking for someone to simply fill a need that you have instead of enjoying them as a whole person, maybe take a look at that and make sure that everyone is aware of the situation. If not someone could get very damaged for a very long time.

Or don't, whatever, I'm not here to tell you how to live your life. I didn't actually mean to invite everyone to an impromptu Ted Talk this is just what was on my mind all day yesterday. Take it as you will.