my life as a man

Sometimes I wish I had been born a man.

I realize this may be a problematic thing for a feminist to admit but that doesn't make it any less true. Despite the obvious advantages- social, biological, financial, I think I would treat myself differently if I were male instead of female.

Let's start with the easy stuff; men's fashion. I love me a slick pair of trousers, a bow tie, a three-button vest, tweed jackets with elbow patches, supple oxfords polished to a shine. Rocking that look with a knowing smile as I walk through a crowd of spectators makes me feel powerful even while its just in my imagination. Throw in a slicked-back 'do and I am done for.

How about confidence? If I were a man, I don't think I would be ashamed of my talents or strengths. As a woman, you learn that if you are too good at something, or too confident, you are going to make men uncomfortable and women hate you. That in order to be loved, it's better to downplay your talents because the world is nicer to a woman who sits down instead of stands out. I don't think that would be the case if I were male. I think I would shout to the heavens about how wonderful I was in the hopes of getting a mate or a promotion or a raise and I bet it would work.

Sex would be so. much. easier. I grant you that men can have a tough time securing a sexual partner- but I'm talking about the act itself. As a woman you are letting someone (who is often) bigger and stronger than you GET INSIDE OF YOUR BODY with the possible side effect of CARRYING THEIR OFFSPRING. It turns the prospect of wanting to get laid into a potentially dangerous act for a woman. If sex could be; get in, get out, get done- how much easier would that be? Make sure to wrap that sucker up and you are golden.

What different choices might I have made if I were a man? Both of my brothers joined the army, but I didn't. Is it because I'm a woman? Did I tell myself I needed to stay behind and keep some sort of unity for our (rather scattered) family? Would I have attempted to secure a high-paying job from an early age to make sure I could provide for my future wife and kids? Would I have been more likely to take larger risks and possibly reap the rewards? I don't know.

My point in all of this, is that nothing above is something that belongs exclusively to men. Anytime I covet anything listed, it is because I have put those limitations on myself. Sure I've got two X chromosomes but I can also rock a bow tie. I can admit when I'm good at something and flaunt it to my advantage. I can have sex however and with whomever I damn well please. My choices are my own and not limited to my fears or the fears of people around me. And you know what? I think that makes me a bad ass feminist. Happy International Women's Day.